“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”
The past few days, I have felt like crap on a cracker, I tell you what. I’m writing a post about it, because writing helps! I am physically exhausted, each day bringing a manifestation of new and exciting symptoms like migraines, extreme fatigue, stomach ache and lower back pain. Even though my thyroid levels are good, I became so cold the other night, my finger nails and lips turned blue. Every joint hurt. My bones hurt.
I felt 85 years old (and not the healthy, amazingly active 85, but the “I’m elderly and have earned the right to complain about it” 85). Then came my bad mood. My attitude has been abominable! Can’t think straight, which makes me angry, and every thing rubbed me the wrong way. Laughter too loud, Geico commercials, the cat jumping over my lap instead of walking around me, helicopter noises…and the list goes on.
I also enjoyed a doctor’s appointment in which the nurse told me, I kid you NOT, that I am approaching the age where I should take off my shoes and not look at the scale. I just stared at her (uh, not the scale) with my eyes popping out of my head and nostrils flared. I’m 27, at a healthy weight, but nevermind THAT, look at my chart. I am FEMALE, so you don’t tell me that!! Later on, I spilled scalding hot coffee over myself. The burn wasn’t as bad as losing some of my coffee. That hurt.
Then yesterday, it culminated into me sitting my car waiting for a meeting and just zoning out. I didn’t want to do ANYTHING. I didn’t want to go to the meeting, I didn’t want to go home, I didn’t want to make a call, send a text or tweet. I just wanted to sit.
I got tired of feeling like crap. Acting like a sack of potatoes actually takes a lot out of you! As Dad would say, “I don’t have time for such foolishness!” I don’t have time for feeling like crap, because I want more time to feel good! We all have our wasted days, but if I can help it, I will do my best to think of something really great each and every day. If I can’t motivate myself, I will look to others who are positive rays of sunshine OR others having crappy days so we can vent about it and hope for a less crappy tomorrow. A glorious tomorrow, one FILLED with sunshine. If nothing works, after prayer and dedicated thought, I will put myself in a caffeine-induced joy cloud. I’m in one right now. I still have a headache and feel physically drained, but my spirit is renewed.